Why Mum’s Shouldn’t Be Allowed Near Google

Written while listening to the song “Bring Me The Disco King”.  Listen to it here.

I guess most Mum’s make do with finding old photos in the garage.  While they’re out in the dust and the cobwebs searching for an old hat stand to pass on to a neighbour they come across an old book that has somehow slipped their memory.  They slowly open to the middle of the book and out drops photos that are so old they’re faded with the passing of time.  They tremble with excitement as their memory is kicked in to gear and proceed to lose the next few hours in internal revelry and reminiscing and any other word that begins with “r”.  And the only thing that can excite a Mother more than finding photos of their past is finding photos of their dear old children in simpler times.

This is all fine and dandy but when they proceed to show loved ones you have to fight the urge to be sick in your mouth.  Yes it is amusing that you once dressed in a similar manner to Paul McDermott circa the Big Gig era but really, does anyone have to see it now?  Sure you looked cute in terry towelling shorts as a three year old but do you have to supply ammunition to your friends by showing them?  I’m sure all Mums do it too.  I bet George Clooney’s Mum busts out “Return of the Killer Tomatoes” when he visits with a new girlfriend.

Now with Mum’s being computer savvy there is a whole world out there to discover and in doing so finding work you have done that has been lost in time.  Mum recently found one such work through the power of youtube and it really did make me want to crawl under my desk while watching it.    What is it?  Well, it’s an edited version of a small independent movie I made with an old buddy around ten years ago.  It is full of dear, old friends (for those of you in Adelaide you may recognise the big fella at the end as a Boltz Cafe icon) and was shot in a time when I really didn’t mind parading around with nothing on.  Oh how times have changed!  The nude years have shuffled off this mortal coil but there is proof that it existed in this comedic farce of a movie. 

Anyway, where Mum is very gracious is that she only sent it to me so I could feel awkward in the safety of my own home.  Unfortunately for me I have this side that kicks in whenever I feel remotely embarrassed.  It is the side of me that whispers seductively into my ear, “You can use this.”  Yes, you can use this!  What magical words for a comedian.  Whether it is on stage, on radio or in a blog, I can never pass up the opportunity to make myself squirm.  It is comedic gold and it doesn’t always present itself when you want it so you have to take it by the horns when the opportunity arises.

So without further adieu I give you “Too Clever By Half”.

And please, be kind.

Justin Hamilton

Fitzroy North

January 13th, 2010